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~ Recipes especially for St. Patrick's Day ~ 

 
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St. Patrick's Day . . .
The Day When Everybody is Irish 

Potato Soup  

 
Irish Potato Soup
 Coddle


Corned Beef & Cabbage


Horseradish Sauce 
 Irish Dumpling Stew Dumplings


Irish Roast Pork with Potato Stuffing


Stuffing

 
Irish
Cabbage Rolls


 Irish Beef in Guiness


Cabbage
Cooked in Milk

Irish Colcannon



Irish Champ

 

Barm Brack

Spotted Dog

 Red Cabbage and Pineapple


 Cabbage With Apples

 

Irish Scones 

Irish Raisin Cake Recipe
 
 Glazed Irish Tea Cake


Chocolate
Irish Cream Fondue

Irish Potato Apple Cake   Irish Coffee Ice Cream


Sheridan’s
Irish Coffee
 

 

Pistachio Cupcakes 

Green Vanilla Frosting


Guinness
Crock Pot
Beef Stew

 

 

Apple-Barley Pudding

Quick St. Patrick's Day Treats


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Potato Soup

1kg potatoes
3 onions
6 cups of half milk and water
Chives or parsley
Rashers (streaky) Bacon, to taste
Salt and pepper, to taste
1 cup light cream.

Directions:
Chop all above into chunks, except milk and cream. Put chunks and milk into a large pot, cover and simmer gently until it goes to a pulp. Put pulp in a blender and puree, add cream. Reheat; place parsley or chives on top. Fried crispy bacon is added to the top on serving.


 

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Irish Potato Soup

2 pounds butter-yellow potatoes, peeled and quartered
1 large onion, chopped
2 oz butter
2 pints vegetable stock
2 pints milk
1 Tablespoon chives or parsley
nutmeg
pinch of salt
1 teaspoon flour 

Directions:
Melt butter in a sausepan and add the Potatoes and Onions, cover and simmer for 10 mins (don't brown veg). Add the Stock, Salt & Pepper and Nutmeg, Stir. Cover and bring to a boil stirring continuously. Reduce heat and simmer for 30 mins, until vegetables are soft, stiringr occasionally. 

Remove from heat and put through a sieve, and return to the saucepan. Stir in the milk and flour and bring to a boil, stirring continuously. 

Remove from the heat, serve with a sprinkling of chives or parsley. 

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Coddle

A favourite of mine, my cooking method is the method my Mother used, the cook book way takes too long and doesn't taste as good. - Billie Connolly

Ham or bacon slices as suit you
Onions as required
Chopped parsley
Potatoes
Salt and pepper
Pork sausages

Directions:
Cut ham or bacon into small pieces. Cut potatoes into quarters. Cut onions into quarters or leave whole. Put all ingredients into large boiler. Cover with water. Simmer until it becomes soupy.


 

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Corned Beef & Cabbage

If it wouldn't be St. Patrick's Day in your house without Corned Beef & Cabbage, here's an authentic recipe from Darina Allen's the Festive Food of Ireland. Even though she points out that it's rarely eaten in Ireland and was most likely made popular by immigrants who missed the salted beef of their homeland. Cured beef was a traditional Easter Sunday dinner; the beef killed and preserved before winter could then be eaten after the long Lenten fast.

I
n the truest sense of the word then, this really doesn't qualify as a traditional recipe. But, it has become so closely associated with the Irish and St. Patrick's Day, we'd be remiss not to include it.


4-pound corned beef brisket - 'silverside' if you can get it; many butchers are familiar with the term and can prepare your cut of brisket in this special way. But, do allow them several days to prepare it properly.
3 large carrots, cut into large chunks
6 to 8 small onions, roughly chopped
1 teaspoon powdered English mustard
1 large spring of fresh thyme and several parsley stalks tied together
1 cabbage
Salt and pepper to taste

Directions:
Put the corned beef into a large pot with the carrots, onions, mustard powder and herbs.

Cover with cold water; bring to a boil and then lower heat and simmer for 1 hour. From time to time, skim fat from top as it rises.

Discard the outer leaves of the cabbage and cut into quarters, Add to the pot. * Cook for another one to two hours or until the meat and vegetables are tender.

Serve the corned beef cut into slices and surrounded by the vegetables. Serve with a generous amount of potatoes, boiled in their jackets and freshly made mustard.

(We use Colman's which is readily available). In addition to the English mustard we also like the following horseradish sauce. Recipe below.



Horseradish Sauce

1/2 pt Whipping Cream
2 tablespoons prepared horseradish

Directions:
Whip cream until it stand in peaks. Fold in horseradish.

Note: We prefer our cabbage crispy firm, so, we cook it separately. Cooked quickly in boiling water, it retains its beautiful bright green color. We season it heavily with fresh ground pepper and we don't go easy on the butter!

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Irish Dumpling Stew

4 medium golden yellow potatoes
2 pounds stew meat, lamb or beef
1/2 cup flour
2 onions, chopped
2 carrots, chopped
2 tomatoes, peeled and chopped
1 clove garlic, minced
1 large bunch of mixed herbs (thyme, rosemary, sage), tied with a string
1 1/2 cups beef broth
salt & pepper to taste

Coat meat in flour, then brown in oil in a skillet. Add onions and garlic and saute. Place browned meat, onions and vegetables in large cooking pot. Place herbs in middle of
mixture. Cover with broth, cook 2 hours over low heat. While stew is cooking, make dumplings. During last 20 minutes of cooking, add dumplings. Salt and pepper to taste.

Dumplings

6 cups self-rising flour
1 cup fresh bread crumbs
1 tablespoon mixed herbs
1/4 cup solid shortening
1 egg, beaten
Broth or water
Salt and pepper to taste

Directions:
Mix dry ingredients, then add shortening and egg, mixing thoroughly. Divide mixture into small pieces, roll into even rounds between floured hands. Cook in boiling water or broth for 15 minutes. Add to stew 20 minutes before stew is done.

Serves 6

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Irish Roast Pork with Potato Stuffing

2 pounds pork tenderloin, or 6 to 8 boneless lean pork chops
2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons hard cider (apple wine) or water
stuffing (see below)
salt and pepper

Directions:
Make stuffing. Rub meat with salt, pepper and butter. Pour cider or water into 3 -quart casserole dish. Place meat along edges of dish. Place stuffing in center of pan. Cover loosely with foil and bake 1 hour at 350 degrees.


Stuffing

4 1/2 cups MountainKing® Gold Potatoes or MountainKing Butter Red Potatoes, coarsely mashed
1/4 cup butter
1 onion
2 large cooking apples, chopped
1 handful chopped fresh sage and thyme
Salt and pepper

Directions: 
To potatoes, add butter, onion, apples, herbs, salt and pepper.  Mix well.

Serves 6

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Irish Cabbage Rolls

1 lb lean ground beef
1/2 head of cabbage, shredded
1 medium onion, chopped
1 envelope onion soup mix
1/8 teaspoon pepper
2 loaves frozen bread dough, thawed

Directions:
Brown ground beef and onion in a large skillet: Drain off fat. Add cabbage, soup mix and pepper during the last five minutes of cooking. Set aside.

Roll one loaf of bread dough into an 8" x 16" rectangle, then cut into eight 4-inch squares. Spoon mixture into center of each square, bring up diagonal points, pinching edges closed. Let cabbage rolls rise on a greased cookie sheet for about 10 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Bake for 20 minutes or until brown. Brush tops of warm rolls with margarine or butter if desired.

Repeat process with second loaf of bread and remaining mixture. This can be frozen and reheated 1 1/2 minutes in a microwave oven.

Makes 16 servings.

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Irish Beef in Guiness

4 russet, red or butter yellow potatoes
2 1/2 lb beef stew meat
2 large onions
6 medium carrots
2 tbsp seasoned flour
1 tablespoon bacon fat or beef dripping
1 cup of Guiness and water mixed
sprig of parsley

Directions:
Cut the beef into chunks and peel and slice the onions and carrots.  Toss the beef in the flour and brown quickly in hot fat. Remove the beef and fry the onions gently until transparent.

Return the beef and add the carrots, potatoes and liquid. Bring just to a boil, reduce the heat to a very gentle simmer, cover and cook for 1 1/2 - 2 hours.

Check that the dish does not dry out, adding more liquid if necessary.

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Cabbage Cooked in Milk

1 quart shredded cabbage
1 1/2 cups milk
2 tablespoons flour
1 tablespoon cooking oil
1/4 teaspoon salt
dash of pepper

Directions:
Add cabbage to milk and simmer for two minutes. Mix the flour and oil and add a little of the hot milk to it. Blend. Stir the milk and flour mixture into the cabbage and cook for three or four minutes or until thickened, stirring constantly. Season with salt and pepper. Makes six servings.

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Irish Colcannon

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6 medium-large golden yellow potatoes, peeled and quartered
4 cups diced savoy cabbage (green cabbage can be substituted)
1 onion, finely chopped or 2 leeks chopped, whites only

1 cup warm milk
1/4 cup butter
salt and pepper to taste

Directions:
Boil potatoes until tender when pierced with a fork—about 20 minutes. Meanwhile, steam cabbage and leeks for 5 minutes. Mash potatoes, add milk, butter, cabbage, leeks, salt and pepper to taste. Serve immediately.

Serve colcannon hot as a side dish.

Serves 6

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Irish Champ

4 pounds quartered golden yellow potatoes
1 cup chopped scallions
1 cup milk
3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1 stick butter, melted
pepper to taste

Champ is served piled high on the dish, with a well of melted butter in the center. It is eaten with a spoon from the outside, each spoonful being dipped in the well of melted butter.

Directions:
Cook potatoes in boiling water 10-12 minutes or until tender. Simmer milk and scallions together for five minutes.

Strain potatoes and mash thoroughly. Add hot milk, and the scallions, salt and pepper, and half the butter.

Scoop a heaping portion of potatoes on each plate. Depress the center making a cavity and drizzle the remaining butter into the center of each portion. Serve immediately.

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Barm Brack

Cream the yeast and the sugar and allow to froth up in the milk, which should be at blood heat. Sieve the flour, caster sugar and spice and rub in the butter. Make a well in the centre and add the yeast mixture and the egg, beaten. Beat with a wooden spoon for about 10 minutes until a good dough forms. The fruit and the salt should be worked in by hand; the gold ring wrapped in greaseproof paper should then be added, and the whole kneaded. Put in a warm bowl, cover and allow to rise in a warm place for about an hour until doubled in size.

1/4 pt/ 125 ml/ 1/2 cup lukewarm milk
1 tsp sugar
1 tsp fresh yeast
8 oz/ 250 g/ 2 cups plain flour
1 tsp mixed spice, pinch salt
1 egg, 3 tbsp butter
6 oz/ 200 g/ 2 cups mixed fruit
(currants, sultanas, raisins, candied peel)
1 gold ring (in greaseproof paper)
2 oz/50 g/2 tbsp caster sugar

Directions:
Knead lightly and place in a lightly-greased 7 in /15 cm diameter cake tin and allow a further 30 minutes rising time.

Bake near the top of a pre-heated oven at gas mark 6, 400°F, 200°C for 45 minutes. On removing from the oven the brack can be glazed with a syrup made from 2 tsp sugar dissolved in 3 tsp boiling water.

From the Appletree Press title: A Little Irish Cookbook

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Spotted Dog

This is the traditional Irish fruit bread, also called Sweet Cake, Curnie Cake, Spotted Dick or Railway Cake depending on the area.

4 C plain white flour
2 teaspoons sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 C raisins, currants or sultanas
1 1/2 C milk or buttermilk
1 egg (optional, you will not need all the milk if you use the egg)

Directions:
Sift the dry ingredients, add the fruit and mix well.

Make a well in the center and add the egg if you are using it, and most of the milk. Using one hand, mix in the flour from the sides of the bowl, adding more milk if necessary. The dough should be softish but not too wet and sticky. When it all comes together, turn it out onto a floured board and knead lightly for a few seconds - just long to tidy it up.

Pat the dough into a round about 1 1/2 inches deep and cut a deep cross in it (to let the faeries out!). Let the cuts go over the sides of the bread.

Bake in a preheated 450 degree F oven for 15 minutes, then turn the oven down to 400 degrees F and bake for another 30 minutes or until cooked. If you are in doubt, tap the bottom: it will sound hollow when cooked.

Serve freshly baked, cut into thick slices and spread with butter.

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Red Cabbage and Pineapple

6 cups shredded red cabbage
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1/2 cup boiling water
1 tablespoon butter or margarine
2 tablespoons brown sugar
1 tablespoon cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 (9 oz.) can pineapple tidbits
2 tablespoons vinegar

Directions:
Place cabbage, lemon juice and boiling water in skillet. Cover and cook, stirring once or twice, until cabbage is tender, 10 to 12 minutes. Stir in butter.

Meanwhile, blend together brown sugar, cornstarch and salt. Drain juice from pineapple and blend into cornstarch mixture along with vinegar. Add cornstarch mixture and pineapple bits to cabbage. Cook, stirring, until mixture thickens and bubbles. Serve hot.

Makes six servings.

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Cabbage With Apples

1 head cabbage
1 red apple, cored and sliced
1/2 cup sour cream
1 tablespoon butter or margarine
1/2 teaspoon salt 3 tablespoons lemon juice

Directions:
Cut the cabbage into six wedges. Cook in a small amount of boiling salted water for seven minutes. Add apple. Cook about three minutes more, until tender. Drain.

Combine remaining ingredients. Heat through, but do not boil. Pour over cabbage. Serve hot.

Serves 6

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Irish Scones

3 cups white flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
2 teaspoons cream of tartar
1/2 cup butter, softened
2 tablespoons sugar
1/2 cup milk or buttermilk
1 cup raisins or other dried fruit
Egg wash, to brush scones

Directions:
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. In a large bowl, sift together flour, baking soda, and cream of tartar.

Add softened butter and sugar, mix well. Stir in milk or buttermilk. Also stir in raisins or dried fruit.

Press dough onto a floured surface and roll out gently to 1/2-inch thickness. Cut scones into round shapes or triangles.

Brush scones with egg wash for shine. Bake for 20 minutes or until golden brown.

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Irish Raisin Cake Recipe

2 1/2 cups buttermilk
2 cups sugar
5 cups flour
1/2 pound butter
5 eggs
1 tsp. each: cinnamon, nutmeg and allspice
2 tsp. baking soda
dash of salt
1 (16-oz. box) brown raisins 
1 (16-oz.) box golden raisins
1/2 cup whiskey, optional

Directions:
Preheat oven to 325 degrees and grease a Dutch Oven.

Cream sugar and butter in large bowl. Add eggs one at a time. Add seasonings. Mix baking soda into the buttermilk. Alternate adding flour, buttermilk and raisins into mix.

Bake for 2 1/2 to 3 hours in covered Dutch Oven. Cake is finished when knife inserted into middle comes out clean.

Optional - pour whiskey over cake immediately after removing from oven. Cake is best when cut after a few days.

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Glazed Irish Tea Cake

Cake:
3/4 cup butter- room temperature
1 cup Sugar
2 t. pure Vanilla extract
2 large Eggs
3 ounce Cream cheese- room temperature
1-3/4 C. Cake flour
1-1/4 t. Baking powder
1/4 tsp Salt
1 cup Dried currants (or dates)
2/3 cup Buttermilk

Glaze:
1/2 cup Confectioners' sugar, sifted
2 t. Fresh lemon juice

Directions:
Preheat oven to 325F, with rack in center of oven. Generously grease a 9-inch (7-cup capacity) loaf pan. Dust with flour; tap pan over sink to discard excess flour. Cut piece of parchment paper or waxed paper to fit bottom of pan. Set aside.

FOR CAKE, use mixer to cream butter, sugar and vanilla until fluffy. Add eggs, 1 at a time, beating each until fluffy. Add cream cheese. Mix until well combined. Sift flour, baking powder and salt together. Put currants (or dates) in small bowl. Add 1/4 cup of flour mixture to currant and stir until well coated. Add remaining flour to batter, alternating with buttermilk. Mix until smooth.

Use wooden spoon to stir in currants and all of the flour. Stir until well combined. Transfer batter to prepared pan. Smooth surface with spatula. Bake until well-browned and toothpick inserted into center comes out clean, about 1 hour, 25 minutes (time will vary with individual ovens). Cake will crack on top. Let cake rest in pan for 10 minutes.

Use flexible metal spatula to separate cake from sides of pan. Carefully remove cake from pan to cooling rack. Spread glaze on warm cake. Let  cake cool completely. Cake can be stored 3 days at room temperature in foil. Cake can also be frozen up to 3
months, wrapped airtight.

FOR GLAZE, combine sugar and lemon juice in small bowl. Stir until smooth.

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Chocolate Irish Cream Fondue

9 ounces  baker's semi-sweet baking chocolate 
1/4 cup  light cream  or heavy cream 
1/4 cup  Bailey's Irish Cream 

Dippers
cake, cubed 
banana chunks 
strawberries, etc.

Directions: 
In saucepan combine all ingredients. 

Stir on low heat until the chocolate has melted& is smoothy. 

Serve in a chafing dish over low heat. 

Dip dipper in sauce.

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Irish Potato Apple Cake

4 Russet, red or butter yellow potatoes cut into 2-inch pieces
2 tablespoons butter
1 tablespoon sugar
1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
3/4 cup all-purpose flour, sifted
4 Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored, and sliced
2 tablespoons butter
1/2 cup firmly packed brown sugar

Directions:
Preheat oven to 425°F. Lightly grease an 8-inch pie plate.

Cook the potatoes in boiling salted water until tender, 12 to 15 minutes. Drain and mash. Add butter, sugar, and ginger and mix well. Stir in the flour to make a soft dough.

On a lightly floured board, form the dough into a ball and divide in half. Roll half into a 8-inch-diameter circle and fit into the prepared pie plate. Arrange the apple slices by overlapping them in 2 concentric circles over the dough. Moisten the edges with cold water.

Roll out the remaining dough into an 8-inch circle and place it on top of the apples. Press the edges together and flute them to make a standing edge. With a sharp knife, make 4 or 5 slits on top to allow steam to escape.
Bake until crust is browned, 25 to 30 minutes.

Remove from oven and cut a 2-inch circle in the top pastry to make a lid. Remove this carefully, add the butter and brown sugar, and replace the lid. Return to the oven and continue to bake until the butter and sugar have melted, about 5 minutes.

Slice and serve immediately, with whipped cream, or a dusting of confectioners' sugar, if you like.

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Irish Coffee Ice Cream

2 eggs, 2 cups skim milk
1 cup brown sugar, 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
4 tablespoons instant coffee powder, 1/2 cup Irish whiskey or brandy
2 cups whipped cream or Dream Whip

Directions:
Combine eggs, sugar, milk, and coffee. Cook and stir over medium low heat until sugar dissolves and mixture is slightly thickened.

Remove from heat, stir in whiskey. Cool to room temperature. Stir in vanilla and whipped cream. Pour into canister. Freeze according to ice cream maker directions.

Makes 2 quarts.

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Sheridan’s Irish Coffee

Heat a stemmed whisky glass by running it under hot water. Add 1 cup of hot coffee and 1 1/2 ounces of Irish Mist liqueur. Top with whipped cream.

Whisky Version:

Pour coffee in a heated glass. Add three sugar cubes and one jigger of whiskey. Add whipped cream to top.

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St. Patrick's Day Pistachio Cupcakes

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1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 box instant pistachio pudding mix
2/3 cup sugar
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 1/4 cups milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
green food coloring
1 cup of green vanilla frosting

Directions:
In a large bowl, stir together dry ingredients.

In a small bowl, combine the eggs, milk, oil and vanilla. Stir in your small bowl of liquid ingredients into dry ingredients. Add green food coloring a little at a time until you achieve your desired shade of green. Pour cupcake mixture into greased cupcake pan about 2/3 full.

Bake at 375 degrees F for 18 to 20 minutes or until golden brown. While cupcakes are baking make frosting.

 

Green Vanilla Frosting

1 cup margarine
2 teaspoons vanilla
4 cups confectionary sugar (sifted)
4 tablespoons milk
green food coloring

Directions:
Mix margarine, milk, and vanilla with fork or electric mixer. Slowly add confectionary sugar and green food coloring a little at a time while mixing. Keep adding confectionary sugar and mixing until you reach desired consistency for frosting.

Let cupcakes cool on rack. Then frost with green vanilla frosting.

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Guinness Crock Pot Beef Stew

4 lbs. Beef Chuck for stew
1 lb. carrots
12 potatoes
Celery stalks
4 Large onions
6 12 oz. cans beef broth
3 12 oz. bottles Guinness beer
Cornstarch

Directions:
Cut beef into 1-inch cubes, add beef and Guinness into crock pot and cook on low for 4 hours or until cooked through.

After the beef has cooked for 3 1/2 hours in the crock pot, cut veggies into 1-inch cubes / pieces and cook in a large pot on the stove until almost done.  Add beef and broth in large pot with vegetables and cook on low heat for 30 minutes more or until veggies are done to your taste.

Stir 3 heaping tablespoons of cornstarch into a small amount of cold water. Stir until dissolved and add to stew. Allow stew to sit for 5 - 10 minutes and check for thickness.

Ladle onto platter and serve hot.

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Apple-Barley Pudding

4 Tbsp. Pearl barley
1 1/2 pound apples Peeled, cored and sliced
3 Tbsp. Sugar
1 Tbsp. lemon juice
3/4 cup heavy cream

Directions:
Put the barley in the water and bring to the boil.

Add the sliced apples and continue cooking gently until the barley and apples are soft. Drain the water.

Press the apples and barley through a sieve, or put through the blender, and put back in the saucepan.

Add the sugar and lemon juice and bring to the boil again. Remove from the heat, allow to cool, and then chill.

Serving Suggestions:
Serve cool with the cream stirred in.

Additional Comments:
Recipe adapted from the Appletree Press title: A Little Irish Cookbook.

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Quick St. Patrick's Day Treats 
By: Susanne Myers

Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day this year with some of these fun and of course mostly green St. Patrick’s Day Treats.

Leprechaun Ale

Place a scoop of lime sherbet into a tall glass, pour ginger ale over it and watch it fizz. This can be made even fancier by rubbing some lime juice on the rim of the glass and then dipping it in green sugar crystals before you pour the leprechaun ale.

Lucky Clover Cake

Prepare 9 x 13 inch cake using a boxed cake mix. We like to use yellow cake for this. Get a can of vanilla frosting and use a few drops of yellow and blue food coloring to color the frosting green. After the cake is baked and cooled down, cut three heart shaped pieces out of the cake. We use a cardboard template to make the hearts even. Arrange them on a plate with the pointy ends pointing toward each other. It will look like a clover leaf. Frost the entire cake with the green vanilla frosting.

Mini Mint Ice Cream Tarts

Purchase a roll of refrigerated sugar cookie dough. Roll the dough into small balls (a little smaller than a golf ball), and press them in the bottoms of mini muffin pans. Bake according to package directions. Press the middle of the cooked dough down after you take them out of the oven. Let them cool for 10 minutes, then transfer them to a baking rack and let them cool completely. To serve, scoop mint ice cream in each of your mini tart shells.

St. Patrick’s Day Cookies

Buy or make simple sugar cookie dough. Let the kids cut out shamrock shaped cookies with a cookie cutter. Bake them. While they are cooling, use food coloring to turn vanilla frosting or a simple powered sugar and milk glaze green. Let the kids decorate the cookies with frosting and plenty of green sprinkles.

St. Patrick’s Day Parfait

Prepare a pack of instant pistachio pudding according to package directions. Mix a few drops of food coloring with cool whip to tint it green. Cut up some kiwi fruit. Layer chilled pudding, kiwi fruit and green cool whip for a completely green St. Patrick’s Day Parfait.

Are you seeing green yet? Give a few of these yummy sweet St. Patrick’s Day treats a try this year. They are always a big hit with our families.

Article Directory: http://www.articledashboard.com

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"May the leprechauns be near you,
To spread luck along your way.
May all the Irish angels,
Smile upon you on St. Patrick's Day."


I hope you enjoy this week's Irish recipes and Irish humor.  Be sure to visit our  St. Patrick's Day Tribute . . . It's a hoot!

Before you leave today, I invite you to share one of your favorite recipes, short cuts or tips with us. You can either mail it to me (3205 Whipple Road, Union City, CA 94587), fax it (510-429-9229), email it to me or put it on the  form, whichever works best for you.

Have a good week . . . 

Joanne
Your San Francisco Bay Area Real Estate Broker and food lover


When it's time to sell your San Fancisco Bay Area home,
be 
contact me


Joanne L. Gardiner, Broker, e-PRO

Advantage Realty
Advantage Mortgage Associates
3205 Whipple Road - Union City, California 94587
(510) 429-4800
San Francisco Bay Area Real Estate 
San Francisco Real Estate on the East Bay

website: http://www.joannegardiner.com


Our primary services in the San Francisco Bay Area are: East bay real estate,  Hayward real estate, Castro Valley real estate,  Danville real estate,  Dublin real estate,  Fremont real estate,  Newark real estate, Niles real estate, Pleasanton real estate, San Leandro real estate, San Lorenzo real estate, San Ramon real estate, Sunol real estate and Union City real estate. 

The types of real estate in which we specialize are:  houses, homes, condominiums, townhomes, garden homes, PUDs, single family homes, manufactured homes, mobile homes, modular homes, duets, residential income property, duplexes, tri-plexes, four-plexes, small apartment complexes and special use properties.

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~ Irish Toast ~

 

"May you be in heaven a half-hour before the devil knows you're dead."

 

 ~ Recipe Links ~


Cooking for St. Patricks Day is always more fun when you can choose from authentic Irish Recipes . . .   

Irish Kitchen Index

Irish Recipe Collection

Kirwilli's Kitchen

Irish Dessert Recipes

Ireland Eyes Traditions,
cooking and travel

  

 ~ Irish Humor ~

 

"Seamus, do you understand French?"

"I do if its spoken in Irish."

 



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Q.    Why did God invent whiskey?

A.   So the Irish would never rule the world.

 



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"If you can guess how many potatoes I've got in this bag you can have both of them."

"Six?"

 "No, but you're only three out. Four!"

 



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 "Hey, Angus, look out the window and see if my
turning indicator's working."

 "Yes...no...yes...no...yes..."

 


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Written on top of Irish ladders is the word . . .

 "stop."

 


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"Fergus, why do you Irish drink?"

"It gives us something to do while we're getting drunk."

 



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An Irish kamikaze pilot flew 48 sucessful missions.
 

 


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Q.     What is Irish diplomacy?

A.     It's the ability to tell a man to go to hell in such a way that he  will look forward to making the trip

 




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Irish Humor



Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place.   Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me.   If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!"

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind, I found one."

 

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Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, "Do you want to go to heaven?"

The man said, "I do, Father."

The priest said, "Then stand over there against the wall."

Then the priest asked the second man, "Do you want to go to heaven?"

"Certainly, Father," was the man's reply.

"Then stand over there against the wall," said the priest.

Then Father Murphy walked up to O'Toole and said, "Do you want to go to heaven?"

O'Toole said, "No, I don't Father."

The priest said, "I don't believe this.   You mean to tell me that when you die you don't want to go to heaven?"

O'Toole said, "Oh, when I die, yes.   I thought you were getting a group together to go right now."

 

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Paddy was in New York and was patiently waiting and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing.   The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, "Okay, pedestrians."   Then he'd allow the traffic to pass.

He'd done this several times, and Paddy still stood on the sidewalk.

After the cop had shouted, "Pedestrians!" for the tenth time, Paddy went over to him and said, "Is it not about time ye let the Catholics across?"

 

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Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died.   He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney.

"Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!"

"Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney.   "Where are ye callin' from?"

 

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An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut   The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?"

"Just water," says the priest.

The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"

The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"

 

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Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender, "Pour me a stiff one - just had another fight with the little woman."

"Oh yeah?" said Charlie, "And how did this one end?"

"When it was over," Mike replied, "She came to me on her hands and knees.

"Really," said Charles, "Now that's a switch!   What did she say?"

She said, "Come out from under the bed, you little chicken."

 

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Flynn staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy.   He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Mary.

He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step.   As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump.   A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.

Managing not to yell, Flynn sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding.   He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.

He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.

In the morning, Flynn woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Mary staring at him from across the room.

She said, "You were drunk again last night weren't you?"

Flynn said, "Why you say such a mean thing?"

"Well," Mary said, "it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly.....it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.

 

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