Good with Coffee... November 5, 2008 This fall America is rising in world opinion...  Congratulations America. We Have a New President! If President Elect Obama runs this country like he did his campaign, we will be in good shape! Believe! President Elect Barack Obama What a remarkable time in history this is and we are all a part of it.  Before I poured my first cup of coffee Wednesday morning I hurried out to get my newspaper off the driveway. Not to read it, but to put it in safe keeping with that other newspaper; The one that dashed my hopes when I was a young woman in the work force being paid less than the man at the desk next to me.  While an estimated 48 million Americans voted for Mr. McCain, it was the approximate  52 million who voted for Mr. Obama that brought this historical event into reality.  From now on we all need to support Mr. Obama in making America better in every way possible. Congratulations Mr. Obama. Whoever the people were who built and maintained Barac Obama's web site and email promotions need also to be congratulated. It was and is impressive.  I hope Mr. Obama continues to communicate with Americans as much as he did during his campaign. Oh, that newspaper I put into safe keeping years ago?  It had mourned the death of  President John F. Kennedy, the end of Camelot.  Today’s newspaper validates there is still hope for all of us in America.  And that's worth preserving. Relief for homeowners and buyers This week I attended a meeting with Federal Home Loan Bank Board representatives who have grant money available for people with adjustable loans and a Wish grant for some buyers.  More information is available in our Credit and Finance section.  Another type of assistance program is expected to become available in December or January for all people regardless of income level, etc. Check back or send me a note on the contact form to be included in our email updates. Remember the Vets in our lives This week a new president and next week we have an opportunity to honor Veterans, the special men and women who have given so much of themselves. Visit Our Veterans' Tribute and send our troops an email of support and thanks.  If you're a veteran please send me a note so I can add you to our special tribute list on the Veterans' page. If you have seen something you think others should know about or something amusing you would like share, please send it to me on the Contact Joanne form or in an email.   Share Coffee Break with your friends. Copy and paste this link into an email: http://www.joannegardiner.com/CoffeeBreak.html Take care, be happy, and stay in touch, Joanne Your San Francisco Bay Area Real Estate Broker... and coffee lover. You heard it here... Your Medical Record Rights - Thanks to Ms. Pam Winterbauer A federal law called the HIPAA Privacy Rule gives you the right to see, get a copy of and amend (correct) your medical record by adding information to it.  (HIPAA stands for the "Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act.")   Most states also have laws that give you rights in your medical record.  These consumer guides are intended to help you understand your rights to your medical records under a combination of these laws. Search records in all 50 states.   Your Medical Rights and Privacy   Art by Columbo ~ Thanks to Mr. Richard DeBiaso Here's a link to Peter Falk's web site.  He likes drawing with graphite and sells his art online.    Art by Peter Falk      Green Tip:  9 Easy Ways to Green the Office 1) Buy ENERGY STAR Office Equipment According to ENERGY STAR, its qualified office and imaging products use 30 percent to 75 percent less electricity than standard equipment. These include computers, monitors, copiers, fax machines, and printers. 2) Install CFL and/or LED light bulbs ENERGY STAR-qualified compact fluorescent bulbs (CFLs) use about 75 percent less energy than standard incandescent bulbs and last up to 10 times longer. You’ll notice the savings immediately. Screw-in light-emitting diode (LED) bulbs are not yet mainstream, but are available. These bulbs will eventually replace CFLs, which contain small amounts of mercury and require special disposal and precautions if broken. LED bulbs will make an even larger dent in your electricity bill than CFL bulbs, but make a considerably larger dent in your wallet (approximately $19.95 for one bulb) and will until they become more widely adopted. 3) Install Motion Sensors Motion sensor light switches and timers automatically shut off lights when offices are not in use. 4) Install Low-Flow Toilets in the Company Bathroom Low-flow toilets use 20 percent less water than standard toilets. Better yet, dual-flush toilets use 0.8 gallons/flush/number one button; 1.6 gallons/flush/number two button. Or, another option that the NATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF REALTORS® has installed in the men’s restrooms of its Washington, D.C., offices is waterless urinals. 5) All-in-One Models Versus Fax Machines If your office still has a fax machine, a scanner, a copier, consider the savings—400 kilowatt-hours of electricity per year ($44/year, depending on location and utility provider)—by upgrading to an all-in-one product. While you’re at it, set your printer’s default to print double-sided mode. 6) Use Natural Resources for Energy Both solar panels and wind turbines use nature to create the energy needed for electricity. 7) Replace Old Computers Who doesn’t love more RAM and a better operating system? Dell now makes a computer that releases less toxins and energy. Its OptiPlex Energy Smart computer meets ENERGY STAR standards. 8) Turn Off Your Computer According to The Wall Street Journal, “American businesses could save $1.72 billion each year merely by getting more employees to shut off their computers at night or allow the machines to enter an energy-saving mode.” 9) Install Energy-efficient Windows Energy-efficient windows are designed to protect the inside environment from the outside by using special glass and framing. A person of inspiration... Against the odds ~ Thanks to Merrilee DeBiaso for introducing us to Tony. Tony Meléndez (born January 9, 1962, in Rivas, Nicaragua) is a Nicaraguan-American guitar player, composer and singer and songwriter who was born without arms. His mother took Thalidomide while pregnant, which caused his disability. Meléndez has learned to play the guitar with his feet.   Meléndez began playing and singing in the Los Angeles area in 1985.  On September 15, 1987 Meléndez sang Never Be the Same while playing the guitar with his feet in a special performance for Pope John Paul II. Visibly moved, the Pope descended from his chair and embraced Meléndez. The Pope told Meléndez, "My wish for you is that you continue to give hope to others and continue in what you are doing", which inspired him. As of 2005, his band, Tony Meléndez and the Toe Jam Band, has a busy concert schedule. Meléndez gives motivational talks and has written a book. He campaigns actively for the pro-life cause.  Meléndez now resides in Branson, Missouri with his wife, Lynn.   Awards and recognition Meléndez has won Unity Awards Male Vocalist of the Year UCMVA in 2000, 2002, 2004 and in 2002 took Artist of the year. He received the Branson Entertainment Award for Best New Artist in 1999, the "Inspirational Hero Award from the NFL Alumni Association at the Super Bowl XXIII and has received special commendations from the State of California for his work with young people and from President Reagan, regarding Tony "as a positive role model for America". + Special Commendation from President Reagan - As A Positive Role Model for America + Special Commendation from State of California - For Work with Young People + Inspirational Hero Award from the NFL Alumni Association at Super Bowl XXIII in Miami + Branson Entertainment Awards - Best New Artist (1999) + Unity Awards - Male Vocalist of the Year UCMVA (2000) + Unity Awards - Artist of the Year UCMVA (2002) + Unity Awards - Male Vocalist of the Year UCMVA (2002) + Unity Awards - Male Vocalist of the Year UCMVA (2004) Watch Tony - You will be uplifted Tony Melendez   A chuckle or two... Why did the Chicken cross the Road? ~ Thanks to Ms. Linda Jo Bruton SARAH PALIN: Before it got to the other side, I shot the chicken, cleaned and dressed it, and had chicken burgers for lunch. BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change! JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One!  that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me. GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun? COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road. BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken? AL GORE: I invented the chicken. JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road.  What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems. OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens. ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks. PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American. MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told. ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone. GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough. BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken 2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never crash or need to be rebooted. ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken? COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one? Fishing ~ Thanks to Prairie Home Companion Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, Teach a man to fish and you will never get another days work out of him.   Govenment in Business ~ Thanks to Mr. Jim Knudsen Back in 1990, the Government seized the Mustang Ranch brothel here in Nevada for tax evasion and, as required by law, tried to run it. They failed and it closed. Now we are trusting the economy of our country to a pack of nit-wits who couldn't make money running a whore house and selling booze.   Virtues ~ Thanks to Ms. Linda Jo Bruton Two of the Greatest Virtues in Life: Patience & Wisdom   Innocence is Priceless ~ Thanks to Ms. Juanita Whiteside One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small American flags mounted on either side of it. The six-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the little boy, and said quietly, "Good morning Alex." "Good morning Pastor," he replied, still focused on the plaque. "Pastor, what is this?" The pastor said, "Well son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service." Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque. Finally, little Alex's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear asked, "'Which service, the 8:30 or the 10:30?"    Formula for water ~ Thanks to Ms. Linda Bruton Teacher:  Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? Donald:     H I J K L M N O. Teacher:  What are you talking about? Donald:     Yesterday you said it's H to O.   Stock Tip ~ Thanks to Mr. Richard DeBiaso Normally I avoid discussing any advice regarding buying or selling of stocks, but I felt this is important enough to share and warn you since this explosive situation might prove to be yet another AIG, Fannie May and Freddie Mac.   So, please review any holdings you might have in the following stocks: American Can, Interstate Water, National Gas Company, Northern Tissue Company.   Due to uncertain market conditions, I advise you to sit tight on your American Can, hold your Water, and let go of your Gas. You may be interested to know that Northern Tissue touched a new bottom today, and millions were wiped clean.   It's a tough market out there. Be careful!    1936 Stainless Steel Ford Sedan ~ Thanks to Mr. Jim Knudsen "This is the 1936 Ford Sedan built for and owned by Allegheny Ludlum Steel.  It was attending our open house and then was featured in a  local parade with over 100 of our salaried, hourly and retired employees walking alongside.  This is one of only four in existence and is the only one currently in running and in roadworthy condition.  The car is in exceptional condition with the interior and even the frame looking great.  All four cars each had over 200,000 miles on them before they removed them from service.  These cars were built for Allegheny as promotional and marketing projects.  The top salesmen each year were given the honor of being able to drive them for one year.  The V-8 engine (max 85 hp) ran like a sewing machine and was surprisingly smooth and quite.  I thought this was a much better looking automobile than the Ford Thunderbird that visited us last year.  FYI, the car was insured (we were told) for the trip to Louisville via covered trailer for 1.5 million dollars.  We were also told that the dies were ruined by stamping the stainless car parts, making these the last of these cars ever produced. More information on the history of these automobiles can be found at Allegheny Ludlum's website."   Things you should know ~ Thanks to Mr. Jim Knudsen 50 THINGS EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW (or 50 Completely Useless Facts!) One of these 50 is incorrect. See answer at end of page   Click here    Because I am a Man ~ Thanks to Mr. Jim Knudsen Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in.  Calling AAA is not an option.  I will win. ______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at.  If another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start."  We will then drink a couple of beers and break wind, as a form of holy communion. _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan.  You're a woman.  You never get as sick as I do, so for you, this is no problem. _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like beer, milk or bread.  I cannot be expected to find exotic items like 'thyme' or 'tofu.'  For all I know, these are the same thing. _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together. _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV.  If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole show looking for it... though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator... (applies to engineers mainly). _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about.  The true answer is always either sex, cars, sex, sports or sex.  I have to make up something else when you ask, so don't ask. _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, I do not want to visit your mother, or have your mother come visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any more than I have to.  Whatever you got her for Mother's Day is okay;  I don't need to see it. And don't forget to pick up something for my mother, too. _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie.  Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't... and if you are feeling amorous afterwards... then I will certainly at least remember the name and recommend it to others. _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing is fine.  I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too.  Either pair of shoes is fine.  With the belt or without it, looks fine.  Your hair is fine.  You look fine.  Can we just go now? _______________________________________________ Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2008, I will share equally in the housework.  You just do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest... Like wandering around in the garden with a beer wondering what to do. This has been a public service message for women to better understand men.   Speeding ~ Thanks to Ms. Julia Flores I got stopped for speeding the other day.  I thought I could talk my way out of it until the cop looked at my dog in the back seat. One Sure You're Driving Too Fast...   The Italian Loan ~ Thanks to Mr. Richard DeBiaso    An Italian walked into a bank in New York City and asked for the loan officer. He told the loan officer that he was going to Italy on business for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000 and that he was not a depositor of the bank.   The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the Italian handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. The Italian produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest. Later, the bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Italian for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parked it.   Two weeks later, the Italian returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07. The loan officer said, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"   The Italian replied: "Minga, where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?"    Ah, the Italians... Bada Bing       Worth a thousand words... Brussels in Bloon ~ Thanks to Mr. Jim Knudsen   Before we say so long...  Before you go, remember your comments, suggestions, and contributions are welcome. When you come across something funny or informative and in good taste, please send it along.  I would love to include it with your name and our thanks.  Be sure to tell your friends about Coffee Break. And if you have time, explore the other sections of our web site.  I leave you to ponder these words a good friend shared with me:  "The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything that comes along their way." Carry that thought with you as you tackle the rest of your week.  For information on buying or selling in the bay area, please call me at 510-429-4800 or send me a note on the Contact Joanne form. Sign up for email alerts ~ Joanne Joanne L. Gardiner, Broker, e-PRO Realtor Advantage Realty Advantage Mortgage Associates 3205 Whipple Road - Union City, California 94587 (510) 429-4800 San Francisco Bay Area  San Francisco East Bay Real Estate Our primary realty service areas in the San Francisco Bay Area: Hayward, Castro Valley, Fremont, Newark, Niles, San Leandro, San Lorenzo, San Ramon, Sunol, Oakland, Foster City, Burlingame, and San Mateo. The types of real estate in which we specialize are:  single family homes, detached homes, attached homes, duets, condominiums, townhomes, garden homes, PUDs, manufactured homes, mobile homes,  income property, investment property, tri-plexes, four-plexes, apartment property, and special use properties such as churches for sale.

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